Coffee…. 13 years later

Regardless if you are Rich, Poor, Black, White, Gay, Straight, Republican, Democrat, Christian, Atheist, Green or Brown-eyed, Left or Right handed – or anywhere in between – (healthy, happy, thriving) relationships/marriages take a lot of constant hard work and dedication.


 Happy thirteenth anniversary to my loving spouse, Eric   :)

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My Wish This Veteran’s Day


I served four years in the Army reserve, and another four in the Air Force reserve (they call us weekend warriors).  Certainly it was a lot of hard work (constant testing – both physically and mentally – to meet strict standards) and I sacrificed tremendously having to constantly leave home in order to fulfill  military orders of training and education above and beyond my weekend and summer obligations.

That being said I never fought in any wars (in fact I missed two by a matter of weeks) and always returned home relatively unscathed.

My heart bleeds for the hundreds that never return home; the thousands that do with missing limbs or suicidal, and the millions that return affected with everything from PTSD to simply struggling to get plugged back into their families and civilian life.

My wish and prayer this Veteran’s Day is that one day soon we will no longer see homeless veterans, veterans without the proper care they need and deserve, and jobs they can return to and be proud of!  I am forever grateful to all the heroes that served.  Happy Veteran’s Day!

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Gay Lives Matter


It takes a lot to disgust me now a days but the recent news from Philadelphia has done just that. Two gay-bashers (Philip Williams and Kevin Harrigan) savagely beat and name-called a couple simply for… well living.

One victim suffered facial injuries so severe that required him to have his jaw wired shut. The outcome: “plea deals which include probation and community service. No jail time.”

Where is the media? Where are the protests, riots and national outrage? Sadly there will not be much of anything simply because those injured and hospitalized were gay and gay lives don’t matter.

I am deeply saddened as the message Philadelphia sent is that gay people are second-class and all are free to tease, taunt, torment and injure with merely a slap on the wrist. What a horrible injustice and scary precedent. My heart bleeds for the victims.

Unfortunately however this doesn’t surprise me. Heinous acts like this are rampant but we rarely hear of them – as again – gay lives don’t matter. When zealots repeatedly scream phrases like “the gay agenda” as fear tactics gay people are simply walking targets.

I’ll let you in on a little secret. The gay agenda is…. are you ready…. that we are seen as equal. Until then these travesties will only continue until all politicians, all preachers, all sports figures, all friends and family boldly and courageously stand up and say, Gay Lives Matter!


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My Beliefs Are My Sword, My Bible Is My Shield

If you are reading this you probably already know I am a die-hard Christian.  I am a proud Christian above all other titles.  Being a Christ follower is a decision I made decades ago, and certainly one of the best decisions of my life.

It is very unfortunate that it took the United States Supreme Court to decide all Americans should be treated equally.  However, on 6.26.15 they did just that.  It is also unfortunate that many “Christians” decided that day was the time to send a loud and clear self-serving message.  The day after the Supreme Court ruled all Americans have a right to pursue marital happiness we see this meme getting shared like crazy.


Sounds innocent, right?  Let’s break it down. 

#1) “Yes, I am a Christian.  I believe the Bible.”

So do hundreds of thousands of Christians who read Luke 6:31 and prayed for the Supreme Court to make the right decision.  The majority of gay people believes in the bible, and has a personal relationship with Christ.  The very first sentence of this meme belittles those relationships.

#2) “I do not support homosexuality/homosexual marriage.”

  1. That’s quite alright.  If you cannot accept all of who I am I am not interested in your support.
  2. The term homosexual marriage, and quotes around it, is very telling of where you stand and what you think.
  3. Did someone recently ask you your opinion as I am not sure why you took this opportunity to ensure all were clear on your stance?

#3) “Yes, I still love you.”  Really, prove it because you have a strange way of showing it!

Yes, we are still friends.” I am glad you think so.  I am not sure I want a friend who doesn’t celebrate me and believes my family is not equal to theirs.

No, I am not judging you.”  Are you being serious here?

No, I am not condemning you to hell.” You don’t need to condemn me to hell the meme you chose to post is doing a fine job implying that.

No, I will not let anyone bully you.” By promoting this meme you are perpetuating the belief that gay people are second class and certainly not of God.  Thus we will continue to experience bullying from pulpits, politicians, the media, sports figures, class-mates, co-workers, parents and the list goes on.  Consider yourself my biggest bully.

#4) “But realize that name calling and stereotyping those of us who stand for what we believe is exactly what you don’t want done to you.”  Although it is more lack of understanding and education on the topic and less of a “belief” I will say I am whole-heartedly against any person stereotyping and name-calling another. This we agree on.

“We have a right to speak what we believe.” I always find it fascinating to hear, “I don’t believe in homosexuality.”  Being gay is not like Santa Claus or the Easter Bunny; it is who we are not a fantasy character one can choose to believe in or not.  Gay people are like the weather; it is what it is.

 #5) Same as you have a right to speak what you believe.” 

Timing my friend.  It’s all about timing.  The gay community suffered and fought for decades, and countless died, to obtain the same rights you enjoy and take for granted every day. Do you have any clue of the hatred, animosity and violence we endure? Have you spent any time educating yourself on who we are and our many contributions before running to the computer with a feel-good self-serving meme?

If the tables were turned I would not steal the excitement of life-changing news, or use that moment as an opportunity to judge, cherry-pick the bible, and disrespect my family and friends. I have friends and family who are divorced and remarried. The bible is against this (Luke 16). I have friends and family that had sex before marriage. The bible is against this (1 Corinthians 7). The majority of my friends and family were not virgins on their wedding night. The bible is clearly against this even calling for their stoning (Deuteronomy 22). I could continue with endless examples but you get the point.

I do not know what would give anyone the audacity to think posting this meme – especially immediately after the breath-taking long-awaited good news to millions of people and families – acceptable let alone loving or Christian.  Again it is the timing in particular that makes this inflammatory.  The psychos at West Baptist Church never picket a funeral until the timing is right for a loud and clear message of deep-rooted dislike.  This meme is not innocent.  It is meant to send a loud and clear – not to mention very hurtful – message.  That is anything but Christian.


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Lemoyne University Performance

It has been YEARS since I last performed Here I Am. Recently, while chatting with a lyricist, I was encouraged to update one of my verses. Although updating a verse is a tad difficult, I do have a surprise twist at the end.

There are a few off notes and certainly holding notes in my forties is not like it was in my twenties but overall I am happy 
Side note: I am not hitchhiking on stage, I am requesting the engineer turn up the music :)

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As both a gay American and public educator I always found it baffling – a travesty really – that gay history is not taught in schools.  We teach on so many cultures/communities but never the contributions the gay community has, and continues to, contribute (and there are countless).  The mere fact that you are reading this on some type of computer device is from the contributions of a gay person (Alan Turing).

I found this short clip (Pentecostal preacher throwing down some education/”Pentecation”) to be refreshing.  From a community still struggling on their journey to celebrate their gay brothers and sisters I am pleased to see this brave man of God courageously stand for righteousness 

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June 26, 2015 was a momentous day.  The day the United States Supreme court ruled that all Americans were equal under the law.

Sadly, however, the internet was quickly saturated with hatred.  It was remarkably clear that not only are the majority unschooled on our history/tremendous contributions but sadly many are unaware of our suffering – past and present.
After reading far too many heart-wrenching posts from the gay community (simply defending who they are and who they love), I decided to create a post to offer hope and inspiration to a someone somewhere who may need it.


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